LnL Discussion: “Subcultures in SL – BDSM, Slavery and Goreans in SL”

Thursday, July 30, LnL met for its weekly discussion. The topic at hand was “Subcultures in SL – BDSM, Slavery and Goreans in SL”. We counted on everyone’s help to keep this discussion a Mature one, respecting the sim rating and it couldn’t have worked out better!

After clarifying what BDSM was (Bondage Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism and Masochism), the group went on to exchange ideas about what was inherent to BDSM, namely the power exchange up to an agreed level. Some disagreed considering that the submissive does hold the power rather than the dominant, although it is often possible to see that the power dynamics are not as clear at times. The interdependency of Master/Slave is extremely powerful both in Real Life (RL) and in SL, everyone acknowledged.

The group also discussed the correctness of the designation “top/bottom” related to Dom/Sub. The majority agreed (not everyone though) to the fact that this expression was not the right one in the BDSM domain because it could point to other contexts, namely gay sexuality.

It was interesting to register that BDSM is not necessarily a sexual issue, but also a mental issue. The complexity and durability of the relations established is very serious, and based on trust and mutual exchange.

Issues like an abusive relationship or emotional insecurity should not be confused with the dynamics of a BDSM relationship, where the Dom offers emotional safety, guided by rules and strong protection. In return the Sub offers total openness. Some defended that despite this situation, the Sub did remain actively responsible for his/her actions and duties.

Regarding BDSM and Slaves in SL, the groups referred the fact that they seem more prevalent in SL than in RL, perhaps due to the anonymity offered by the virtual world, allowing people to be more open about themselves. This works as a source of interior balance, whether emotional, sexual or other. There are dangers as well; the normal dangers present in a relationship or excesses of misuse, hence the need to exercise some self-protection.

The group also talked about the meaning of elements like the collar or the leash as being like a wedding ring, although some argued that they could be much more than that, they could represent an extra level of control.

Then the discussion moved on to the Goreans. Some stated it was a subset of BDSM, others an RP system being more rigidly defined than BDSM and not gender relevant, contrary to what one might think. Gorean could also be a lifestyle, expressing more than just RP and sexuality, namely reflecting on furniture, clothes, and a fantasy feel.

As it was mentioned, this is an open group with open minds and that made discussing a topic like this possible! It was a very interesting discussion! Thank you, everyone! Join us next week for a new topic and a fun discussion at LnL’s Lounge!

~ Lizzie ~

CORRECTION: This was not a discussion from the future, as someone pointed out in the comments quite correctly!! LOL The date was June 30! :)